Thank God for...

Thank god for Strawberry flavored Vodka, cause 10 shots of that is way better than 7 of regular. Thank god for high waisted jeans cause I'm tired of my ass crack showing. Thank god for spare tires (donuts acorse), they can last up to months, son!! Thank god for any fast food that's open past 2am. Thank god for Gangsta Rap, because sometimes I just wanna say, "bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks". (Bitches. Pertaining to men of course). Thank god for friends, because when I talk it seems more like pouring my heart out and less like complaining. Thank god for "Fresh Prince of Bel Air", reminds me of once upon a time when there were no bills and my biggest problem was what to wear on the first day of school. Thank God for Facebook, Myspace, Music videos, Walmart, Award Shows, and the clubs, because without them I can't have judgemental conversations about people and their outfits, shoes, facial expression, future husbands (or secret husbands), weaves, and of course performances to make me feel better about myself. Thank God for Baseball and Golf Season, its just a constant reminder to get my ass off of the couch and to do something other than watch T.V. because everything on T.V. will put me straight to sleep. Thank God for Greys Anatomy, nothing more to be said. Thank God for Old Navy, because cheap and decent is in, in 2008. Thank God for tights and leggings because everyone. no matter the size seems to have enough self esteem to put them on. Self-esteem is good! Thank God for Amy Winehouse, good music and GREAT laughs! Thank God casual sex isn't so bad anymore. Thank God coffee isn't just for the morning. So needless to say, "Starbucks" is heaven. Thank God you can walk into 7-Eleven dressed as a welfare check cashin, veitnam veteran bein, clown suit wearin, R.V. drivin, leather coat in the summer time doin, Uggs with courdaroy rockin, rollers in you are hair havin, snaggle tooth danglin bum, because I'd never go. Thank God for bar-b-que, because life would never seem priceless. Thank God for struggle, because my name would just be Barney and Friends. Thank God for "soft rock"; like "Lady in Red" and "You Mean the World to Me", because love would be pointless. Thank God for parks, because I would never get the "don't talk to strangers" speech. Thank God for, tweezers, mirrors, magazines, models, clothes, and IKEA, because I'd have no obsessions.

THANK GOD, I'm alive and well. I better get over the rest of my so called "hardships". Life aint so bad, I'm sure another episode of "I Love NY" is coming on!

Why not run a yellow light?

I say, fuck the yellow light! The yellow light tells me a lot about Garrett A. Morgan. He's a wuss! I wants nothing in between. Go or stop. Stop or go. Go, go , go. Stop, stop, stop. Yellow lights are for losers and pansies, pansies and losers. If it were up to me, lights would have no existence. We'd just jump in the car and drive that bitch like Jeff Gordan with the Texas Giant as the track, and 2 fat people in the back, named Chrilife and Deathisha. You stop and I go, I go and you stop, I go and you go. Crash, crash, crash. Hopefully I would had went out the night before and drank until I was on top of tables showing my tits, yelling out profanity that even HBO can't play, and dancing as if my life depended on it, all while in Rio De Janeiro, sippin' Caipirinhas and playing the guitar with Pharrell and Snoop, shooting the "Beautiful Part 2" video. You know living life the way everyone secretly wants to live, but too damn afraid. Scared some lightening bolt will fall from the sky, and strike you down, and in fear that now life as you know it is more fucked up then it was before. I just wanna go 60 mph and then stop, stop, stop and slam on my brakes for dear life. everyone in the car with me...their lives will flash, flash, and flash before their eyes, including the kids and the dog. I sit waiting, waiting, and waiting , for the light to turn green, so that I can put the gas so far down life's throat, I put my foot up my own ass. I go, go, go, so fast i can smell rubber. I know that no matter how fast I go I know there will be yet another light waiting for my ass, just so I can slam on the breaks again, again, and again. Am I stopping or going?

Maybe I'll STOP.
Should I pay my cell phone bill?

But damn GO seems better.
Should I say FUCK IT, Im going to the club. Which means I'll have just enough to get me a new pair of earrings and a cheap shirt from Charlotte. Hoping, just hoping it will freshin up these stale ass clothes from two years ago when I pulled this same stunt.

This time I'm gonna STOP.
Maybe I should wear a condemn?

Man, It's been awhile, I say GO.
Or should I literally FUCK IT and just raw dog it? I mean I took her out for a drink she paid for, and pretended to listen to her go on and on about wanting to be a model/baton twirler, while i stared at her nipples peeking through her shirt. Praying, just praying the pull out method will work, because I hate the last two kids I got.

STOPPING.
Should I go to work on time today?

GOING FAST.
Maybe Ill just say FUCK IT and sleep in just a little bit longer? Its better that way, teach "the man" whos really running shit. Guessing, just guessing my boss doesnt work today, to see that Im 30 minutes late for the 4th time, on probation, and out of uniform wearing the white and baby blue Jordans i borrowed from the homie, instead of these ugly ass black dress shoes i bought from Payless with pancake batter on it from my second job at the Waffle House.

STOP to the 3rd power.
Should I eat yet another salad?

GO GO GADGET.
I say I warm-up the entire batch of Krispy Kreme donuts, put 6 on a plate, add ice cream, and eat it with a spatula until my tummy hurts so bad, and wake up to find out im late for work a-damn-gin. No? Even if I start my diet tomorrow that consists of any diet pill that promises I loose at least 15 pounds in a 10 days, water pills, protein gum, and the new exercise machine you sleep in that requires nothing but 6 hours of sleep a day to shed inches? What if I start right after my nap? I should definitely choose STOP on this one.

STOP it.
Should I communicate clearly and affectively today?

GOOOOOOOOO.
Or should I just say to hell with this? and drive my car right through the double doors of Walmart and run over the three check out ladies, and the 40 million costumers standing in line with their bad ass kids and baskets full of fruit loops, Swiffer refills, and "Sam's Choice" bottled water followed by a drive by electronics to snatch up a flat screen for the living room and the bathroom, where i will of course see at least 3 losers I went to high school with and not only will i run over them but reverse and run over them again for doing the same shit they were doing in high school still 'til this day. Clearly driving my car into the store will just get my groceries into the car faster, anyways.

STOP in the name of love.
Should I just purchase gas with some spare change?

GOING very fast.
I think i should just pump it and get them back next time.Maybe? What'd you say mister gas pump machine? Pre-pay or credit card only? Well damn... I only have 6 quarters and I was really hoping to cash that in to the car wash to wash my 20's, plus my credit card was maxed a trip to Ted's, nail salon, and three shirts ago, but if I have at least $2 in my checking account the debit card will be approved, and although Bank of America charges $33 in over draft fees, I'll just pay them back next friday when I get paid. works for me.

Always STOPPING and GOING. go, go, go and stop, stop, stop. go, stop, go. An infinite number of different ways to position our gos and stops. Hopefully I'll stop the same time and place LeBron James stops. If not, I guess you'll do.

fears are as pointles as life without love

sometimes i get scared, like everyone, i have fears. Everyday, as im growing, experiencing, and pretending to be going after what it is i know i want, im afraid. Afraid that the script that plays in my head is never going to be heard, let alone seen, and only through the highest gates, would they ever be awarded. In my little head I see greatness, and the story i tell can move mountains sized larger than anyone can measure. But I fear, unlike myself, TIME, with its persistence and endurance despite change, is passing me by effortlessly. As eager as i am for change, i fear that im misguided through life due to lack of strength on my part, and change cant come soon enough.. Why the dismay, des? Why are you not as whole as it appears on the outer layers? i ask.

I hear my cry when Im dancing, but what do they listen to? I feel the rhythm in my soul, but why is it they can only hear the music? I can see the lines I stretch for moments that are infinite, but do they see them dim at my very last finger tip? Who am i? I know what I am inside, but what is stopping me from bringing it to surface.

The fear lies in the fact that I am the only power holding me back, and I cant place my tongue on the words to tell me otherwise.

I can't let time grow as i wither..

I must shine tomorrow.